- To talk to someone at length, often excessively or boringly, about a particular topic, personal problem, or opinion. It usually implies the listener is somewhat trapped or obliged to listen.
Explanation
Origin
- The image suggests talking so persistently and perhaps tiresomely that the listener's ear feels metaphorically 'bent' out of shape or worn out from the effort of listening.
- Implies a lengthy, often one-sided, conversation.
- Dates from the mid-19th century.
Synonyms & Related Expressions
Alternatives
Slang/Informal:
- Talk someone's ear off
- Drone on (and on)
- Gab / Yack / Yap (All imply excessive, sometimes annoying talk)
- Go off on one (UK Talk angrily or excitedly at length)
- Spill your guts (Reveal everything, often worries/secrets)
- Talk nineteen to the dozen (Talk very rapidly and continuously)
Vulgar/Emphatic:
- Talk out of their ass (Talk nonsense, not necessarily at length)
- Won't shut the fuck up / WTFU (Aggressive complaint about excessive talking)
More Formal:
- Speak at length
- Expound upon / on
- Hold forth on
- Monopolize the conversation
- Discourse upon
Situational Appropriateness
- Informal.
- Often used self-deprecatingly when asking to talk (Mind if I bend your ear?) or as a complaint (He bent my ear).
- Not suitable for formal contexts.
Misunderstanding Warnings
- Purely metaphorical – no physical bending involved. Emphasize the meaning of talking at length, potentially boringly or overwhelmingly.
Examples
- Sorry to bend your ear, but I really need to tell someone about this frustrating situation.
- My neighbor bent my ear for an hour yesterday about his conspiracy theories.
- If you get stuck talking to him, he'll bend your ear about his coin collection.
Dialogue
Colin: Hey Jen, have you got five minutes? I need to bend your ear about this new office policy. It's driving me crazy.
Jen: (Sighs internally) Uh, okay Colin. What's the issue?
Colin: Well, first of all, the lack of consultation is ridiculous, and secondly... [continues talking non-stop]
Jen: (Nodding politely, checking her watch)
Social Media Examples
- Tweet: Just need to bend someone's ear for a minute. This week has been INSANE. Anyone free for a quick vent session? #stressed #rant
- Blog Post Title: Confessions of an Introvert: How to Survive Having Your Ear Bent at Parties
- Facebook Status: Apologies to my best friend whose ear I thoroughly bent on the phone last night about my dating woes! Thanks for listening ❤️
Response Patterns
- (If someone asks permission politely, e.g., Can I bend your ear?): Sure, what's up? / Of course, go ahead. / I've got a few minutes.
- (If complaining about having had one's ear bent): Oh, that sounds tiring! / Yeah, he does tend to talk a lot. / You poor thing. / How did you escape?
Common Follow-up Questions/Actions
- When asking permission: The speaker then launches into their lengthy talk.
- When subjected to it: The listener might try to politely interject, change the subject, make excuses to leave, or simply endure it patiently (or impatiently).
- Afterwards: Complaining to someone else about the experience.
Conversation Starter
- No. It describes the act of lengthy talking or is used apologetically before doing so (Sorry to bend your ear, but...).
Intonation
- Stress often on BEND and EAR.
- He BENT my EAR for ages.
Generation Differences
- Understood by most generations, though perhaps feels slightly more traditional.
- Younger generations might use phrases like talked forever, went on and on, or wouldn't shut up.
Regional Variations
- Widely used in all major English-speaking regions.
- Talk someone's ear off is an equally common alternative.