- Used to emphasize that two people or parties are required for certain activities or are both responsible for a particular situation, especially conflict or cooperation.
- It implies shared blame or shared effort.
Explanation
Origin
- Comes from the Argentinian dance, the tango, which requires two partners moving in coordination.
- Popularized by the 1952 song Takes Two to Tango by Al Hoffman and Dick Manning, sung by Pearl Bailey.
- The phrase highlights the necessity of involvement from both sides.
Synonyms & Related Expressions
Alternatives
Slang/Informal:
- Takes two, baby. (Casual)
- Wasn't just him/her.
- They both fucked up. (Vulgar, assigns blame)
Vulgar/Emphatic:
- They're both assholes in this situation. (Assigning negative traits to both)
Milder/Standard:
- Responsibility is shared here.
- Both parties contributed to the situation.
- Cooperation is needed from both sides.
Situational Appropriateness
- Appropriate in most informal and semi-formal discussions about relationships, conflicts, or collaborations.
- Can be used in professional contexts when discussing shared responsibility, but the slightly informal tone might not fit very formal settings.
Misunderstanding Warnings
- Generally well-understood.
- Non-native speakers might not immediately grasp the implication of shared responsibility if unfamiliar with the idiom.
Examples
- She blames him for the argument, but it takes two to tango.
- This partnership failed because neither side would compromise. It takes two to tango.
- Don't just blame the seller; it takes two to tango to make a deal.
Dialogue
Anna: I can't believe Mark and Sarah broke up. Sarah said Mark was impossible to live with.
Leo: Maybe, but it takes two to tango. I heard they were both arguing constantly.
Anna: That's probably true. Relationships are complicated.
Leo: Exactly. It's rarely just one person's fault.
Social Media Examples
- Tweet: Reading about the latest political fallout. Seems like it takes two to tango – both parties refusing to budge. #Politics #CompromiseNeeded
- Comment on relationship advice forum: He sounds difficult, but remember it takes two to tango. What role did you play in the arguments? #Relationships
- Facebook Post: Stop blaming just one side for the project delay. It takes two to tango, and communication was bad all around.
Response Patterns
- You're right, both sides played a part.
- True, it wasn't all one person's fault.
- I guess so. (Reluctant agreement)
- But one person was definitely more responsible! (Disagreeing with equal blame)
- Exactly. They need to work together. (If referring to cooperation)
Common Follow-up Questions/Actions
After someone says It takes two to tango:
- The conversation might shift to analyzing the roles or faults of both parties involved.
- People might discuss how responsibility should be shared.
- It can lead to suggestions for reconciliation or mutual effort.
Conversation Starter
- No.
- Usually used as a comment or judgment on an existing situation involving two parties.
Intonation
- Emphasis often falls on two and tango. It takes TWO to TANGO.
- Can be said with a tone of admonishment, neutrality, or stating an obvious truth.
Generation Differences
- Widely understood by most generations, though perhaps slightly less common among very young people who might not be as familiar with the song or the dance reference. Still generally known.
Regional Variations
- Common in all major English-speaking regions, particularly American English due to the song's popularity.