Explanation

  • A formal phrase used before expressing disagreement, criticism, or a contradictory opinion, especially to someone in a position of authority or seniority, or when discussing a sensitive topic.
  • It signals that you intend to be respectful despite disagreeing.

Origin

  • Formulaic expression from formal discourse and etiquette. Due means 'owed' or 'appropriate'.
  • Intended to cushion the impact of the disagreement that follows.

Alternatives

Blunt/Informal (Avoid when trying to be respectful to authority):

  • Look, you're wrong about this.
  • That doesn't make sense.
  • Seriously?

Sarcastic/Passive-Aggressive (If tone is wrong):

  • The phrase itself can become sarcastic. Well, with all due respect (dripping sarcasm), that's the stupidest idea I've ever heard.

Situational Appropriateness

  • Best suited for formal situations when disagreeing with superiors, elders, or experts in their field.
  • Can be used in semi-formal settings for sensitive disagreements.
  • **Warning:** Overuse or use in casual settings can sound stiff, overly formal, or sarcastic. If used with the wrong tone, it's often perceived as *disrespectful* despite the words. Often joked about as meaning I think you're an idiot, but I have to be polite.

Misunderstanding Warnings

  • The biggest risk is the tone. Non-native speakers must be careful to use a genuinely respectful tone, or the phrase backfires badly.
  • Learners might think it grants a license to be rude afterwards; it doesn't. The disagreement following should still be phrased carefully.

Examples

  • With all due respect, sir, I believe your analysis overlooks some key data.
  • With all due respect, Professor, the textbook offers a different explanation.
  • With all due respect, I think you're mistaken.

Dialogue

Senior Manager: We need to cut the training budget by 50% to meet targets.

Junior Manager: With all due respect, Ms. Evans, cutting it that drastically will severely impact employee development and morale, potentially costing us more in the long run through attrition.

Senior Manager: I understand your concern. Explain the specific impacts you foresee.

Social Media Examples

  • Formal Email/Message: With all due respect, Dr. Lee, I found a discrepancy in the data presented on page 5.
  • Comment on a public figure's statement: With all due respect, Senator, your claims about the economic impact don't align with the latest non-partisan reports.
  • (Often used ironically/sarcastically online): Tweet: My cat just knocked over my coffee again. With all due respect, you furry menace, that was the good stuff. #CatsOfTwitter

Response Patterns

  • Listening attentively (as the preface signals a potentially important disagreement).
  • Defensiveness (if the disagreement is perceived as a challenge).
  • Openness: Okay, I'm listening. What's your perspective?
  • Annoyance (if the phrase is perceived as insincere or overly formal).

Common Follow-up Questions/Actions

  • The speaker immediately states their disagreement or counter-point clearly but respectfully.
  • The listener (often the person being addressed) typically responds directly to the substance of the disagreement.

Conversation Starter

  • No. It's a preface to disagreement within a conversation.

Intonation

  • Usually spoken in a measured, serious, and respectful tone.
  • Even stress across the phrase, or slight emphasis on due and respect. With ALL DUE reSPECT...
  • Followed by a slight pause before the disagreement.
  • **Warning:** Tone is crucial. If said sarcastically or angrily, it becomes highly disrespectful and condescending.

Generation Differences

  • More associated with older generations or very formal professional environments. Younger generations might find it overly formal or potentially passive-aggressive depending on context.

Regional Variations

  • Used across English-speaking regions, particularly in formal business, academic, or political contexts. Perhaps slightly more common or expected in British English formal settings compared to very casual American contexts.
I'm not so sure about that