Damned if you do, damned if you don't

[1281] It figures

🎲 You would say that
English Idioms
All Idioms

Explanation

  • An expression of mild frustration, sarcasm, or resignation used when something inconvenient, annoying, or negative happens that seems typical or predictable.
  • Means That's just typical or I should have expected that.

Origin

  • Likely shortened from That figures into the pattern or It figures that this would happen.
  • Implies the event fits a known, often negative, pattern of events or luck. Popularized mid-20th century.

Synonyms & Related Expressions

  • That figures. (Very common variant, especially AmE)
  • Typical!
  • Wouldn't you know it.
  • Just my luck.
  • Par for the course. (Means 'normal or expected, especially something bad')
  • Story of my life. (If relating it to personal bad luck)
  • Sod's law. (UK If something can go wrong, it will)
  • Murphy's law. (If something can go wrong, it will)

Alternatives

Slang/Informal:

  • Figures. (Shortened)
  • Sounds about right. (Sarcastic agreement with predictability)
  • Go figure. (Expresses puzzlement or mild irony, slightly different meaning)

Vulgar/Emphatic:

  • No shit. (Meaning 'obviously' or 'predictably', can be rude)

Milder:

  • That's predictable.
  • I'm not surprised, unfortunately.

Situational Appropriateness

  • Informal to semi-formal. Expresses mild negativity or cynicism.

Misunderstanding Warnings

  • Learners might confuse figures with calculation or representation. Needs teaching as an idiom expressing expected misfortune or annoyance.

Examples

  • I washed my car this morning, and now it's starting to rain. It figures.
  • The one day I decide to walk to work, the bus flies past right on time. It figures.
  • (Hearing that a notoriously unreliable person is late again) Late again? It figures.

Dialogue

Ken: I found the perfect parking spot right away!

Lisa: Nice!

Ken: ...And then I realised I left my wallet at home.

Lisa: Oh no! It figures. Just when you get lucky with parking.

Social Media Examples

  • Tweet: Phone battery died right as I needed directions. It figures. 🤦‍♀️ #badluck
  • Facebook status: Planned a picnic for the first sunny day in weeks. Woke up to rain. It figures.
  • Comment on a post about delays: My train is cancelled? It figures. Always happens when I'm running late.

Response Patterns

  • Yeah, typical.
  • Wouldn't you know it.
  • That's always the way, isn't it?
  • Sorry to hear that. / That sucks.
  • A sympathetic nod or sound (Ugh).

Common Follow-up Questions/Actions

After hearing It figures:

  • The listener might offer sympathy (Oh, bad luck) or share a similar tale (That happened to me last week!).

The speaker might:

  • Briefly elaborate on why it's typical (This always happens!).

Conversation Starter

  • No. A reaction to an event or information.

Intonation

  • Usually said with a sigh or a tone of annoyance or weary acceptance.
  • Emphasis typically on figures, with a falling intonation. It FIGURES.

Generation Differences

  • Common across generations, though That figures might be slightly more common than It figures among younger speakers.

Regional Variations

  • That figures is very common in American English. It figures is also used and understood everywhere.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't
🎲 You would say that